So… Now I’m married, I’m wondering if I really have to celebrate this valentine’s day thing… since we married, doesn’t that show ultimately that we love one another? Enough to take the vow… “till DEATH do us part”?
Now I don’t mind if buying a Valentine’s Day gift for a guy means flowers and a teddy bear plus some chocolates… except not.
So, let’s check out google search “Valentine’s gifts for men/husbands”… Some say electronics, others say flying lessons, motorcycle classes (a Ducati, anyone?), work out equipment, fancy tool sets, etc etc. All those sound fine, unless your goal is trying to unclutter your house…. (btw, there’s only two of us… we don’t even have kids yet, and I’m trying to unclutter our place almost every other day! and believe me, I’m not the only one generating the clutter…)
Cook a nice meal? Fine, I can understand that. Flowers and fruit baskets and chocolates? Fine, perishables, I can understand that, too. But more apparatus and equipment and “stuff” … I’m not sure… sigh, I feel like I still have tons of gifts that are in their boxes from Christmas and… gasp… our wedding…
You know, I think some of my favorite Valentine’s Day were when I was SINGLE! 🙂 I kid you not.
Now that I’m married, I’m not sure if my club of girlfriends will still accept me if I wanna join in on one of these Valentine’s Day girls’ nights. But they were wonderful. They weren’t extravagant or expensive. But they were real, and they were loving and they were true. True friendship. “True LOVE!” In the sense that we loved hanging out with one another, we cared for each other, we enjoyed and appreciated the time that we had with one another.
I remember we would do fondue maybe a movie, maybe a board game, or just chat (while the movie we were “supposed” watch was on pause). Sometimes we would cheer one another up (if some were going through difficult breakups). Other times, we’d make hot chocolate and dumplings and use Valentine’s Day as a reason to reach out to the homeless and roam the streets and shelters of Philadelphia to care for the poor and hungry on a day of “LOVE”.
On the other hand, I can understand how when we are single, we feel sad and lonely on valentine’s day, and a gathering with the girls just seem like a pity party or a consolation prize. But I think the years that we have to be able to spend with our close girl friends are really few! Once we are married, then for the rest of the time, we’ll be doing valentine’s with one other person (which is AWESOME. but no more girls’ nights with PJs and chocolate fondue). Once we have kids, we’ll probably be helping them get with their little valentine boxes and valentine cards (remember those?). I just heard a mom of 4 tell us about getting ready for Valentine’s Day at school for FOUR kids! Wow!
So there will be many years, wonderful years, to spend Valentine’s with your hubby and your children. But the few years of being single and able to spend it with a bunch of giggly silly crazy girlfriends are few, and so precious.
So if you’re out there, and you’re worried, don’t be, “that” guy or girl will come soon. And if you have some friends getting together and you think it’s just a consolation prize, it’s not!
That type of friendship, that scene of us girls huddled in someone’s living room giggling, or the scene of us girls bunched up at bars and restaurants and watching other people’s dates and toppling over in fits of laughter …is just… wonderously precious, inexchangeable. Those are some of my most precious and prized memories. 🙂