I should think to re-name my blog. Just kidding. Hopefully, in a few years… I’ll be not so “new” at being a wife anymore.
Being a wife… is HARD! Not just suddenly thinking for two people, but also being responsible for a whole new set of things, and on the other hand letting go control on a bunch of other aspects in life.
Of course, there is the constant living and talking to each other, which is awesome! But, here we go, learning about “it’s not WHAT you say, it’s HOW you say it.” The husband and the wife are two separate beings, with two individual minds and two different agendas. They have both very good ideas and opinions, but once again, they are two. And now we are ONE.
We need to come up with ONE plan, ONE agenda. We need to figure out ONE set of rules, not two. We need to run our lives that match to ONE schedule, not two.
We both have feelings, we can hurt each other’s feelings. We have different sets of interpretations towards ONE same event, or tone, or sentence, or phrase, or word….
Being a wife is hard. I can’t even find which aisle the waffle mix is in when I go grocery shopping! I never went grocery shopping. If I wanted waffles, I’d walk half a block and pay $4-$6 for a belgian waffle made with whatever crazy ingredients I wanted.
I don’t know what a zucchini and a cucumber looks like. Actually, I know what they look like, but I can’t tell them apart. And why do stores put them so close to each other?!?
I need to run errands to the bank, dry cleaners, grocery stores, post office, etc etc. I keep getting lost in this new state, and albeit I can be a tough driver, but I have had one or two scares on the freeway here, too.
When I lived by myself, I never cooked. I could go to the grocery store once every 5 months. “What?” you say, “No produce would last that long!” Exactly! Because I never bought produce. I went to buy popcorn, chips, frozen food, etc. Now, I try to cook dinner for my husband. And I realize I have to have double my usual single serving sized portions. Now I have to go to the grocery store every 2-3 weeks. (I hear that’s still really rare… some women have told me, “wait till you have kids!”)
I’m learning how to run a house, a kitchen, and maintain my own life and work all at the same time.
I had no problems doing the wedding part, since that was all party/event planning, contracts, delegations, running committees and groups and tasks and lists, etc.
But now… I have to go from no domestic skills to…. lots of domestic skills.
Thank God for a patient and helpful husband.
I heard this song today on the car (doing my “routine” grocery store trip, yet again), Matthew West- Strong Enough.
It reminds me… that I’m not strong enough to be a wife, a good wife, a perfect wife. But God is.
Strong Enough – by Matthew West
You must, You must think I’m strong
To give me what I’m going through
Well, forgive me. Forgive me if I’m wrong
But this looks like more than I can do
On my own.
I know I’m not strong enough to be
everything that I’m supposed to be
I give up
I’m not strong enough
Hands of mercy won’t you cover me
Lord, right now I’m asking You to be
Strong enough, Strong enough
For the both of us
Well, maybe Maybe that’s the point
To reach the point of giving up
Cause when I’m finally, Finally at rock bottom
Well, that’s when I start looking up
And reaching out
Cause I’m broken
Down to nothing
But I’m still holding on to the one thing
You are God and you are strong
When I am weak
I can do all things
Through Christ who gives me strength
And I don’t have to be
Strong enough, Strong enough