It seems that men only want the peachy, rosy, romantic, sexy stuffs in relationship. They don’t want the emotional baggage, the deep issues, the pet peeves, the personal hang ups, the past hurts and burdens. Start to deal with those, and watch your man cringe in a corner or even jet right out the door.
Perhaps men really are the more idealistic lovers. They want the candlelit dinners, they want to swoon you with flowers and love songs, they want the kiss under the stars, they want to stare deep into your eyes and into your soul. Oh wait, but not your real soul, just the pleasant one that is pleasing and happy and always eternally optimistic.
Show them a tear, and they get all uncomfortable. Try to share an issue about the relationship that is bothering you, and they get defensive and frustrated and impatient. Dare to bare the deeper side of your emotions and thoughts, and they start to get upset.
Where does that leave us? In a state of constant apology or in constant covering and hiding.
“I’m sorry, but I just have these issues with XYZ.” “Please hear me out. I know its annoying, but I need to talk this out.” “Ohh, um, nothing. Nothing is on my mind. Its ok. Don’t worry about it. It totally didn’t bother me. I’ll get over it. I should get over it. It’s my fault.”
How horrible. Why should we apologize? Why should we be ashamed of our hang ups and pet peeves? Why can’t we just be who we want to be? Flaws and all. Perfections and all!