So I was just talking to a friend. And he told me that he went through something very similar.
He broke up with his girlfriend, and then found out she had hooked up with other people even before the break up.
So that got me thinking…
Which one would be better? and less painful?
1. To find out after the break up? so you’re more emotionally removed and to say, well, thank goodness we broke up. Therefore it doesn’t hurt as much? but at the same time, since its all in the past, there’s nothing you can do or say to change it.
2. To find out during the relationship? So at least you can have the option of breaking up because of the cheating? However, you were in the relationship and committed and emotions are fully engaged when you find out that they are cheating?
Another thing that I was also thinking, physical or emotional cheating? which is worse?
Psychological studies show that men care more about physical fidelity and women care more about emotional fidelity.
So the fact that your significant other hooked up with someone (or multiple peoples), does that hurt worse? Because everytime they touch you or kiss you or hold you, your skin pricks, because those same hands touched another woman or man. (1)
Is it worse that they didn’t do much (like only light lip kiss in my case), but they went all out over emails about their feelings and emotions for each other? Professing their love, and saying they can’t stop thinking about each other and that they want to be with each other so badly? that instead of talking on the phone with me, he’s talking to her and emailing her as he’s talking to me on the phone?
which is worse?
(obviously, I’m a bit biased…. )
but I’m just throwing it out there.